Nothing has happened today either. I'm bored with my own life. Trade anyone?

Seriously my life is boring when I have to work. Even work is boring. Back to the scale of deathly boring to omg wtf crazy... today was a 1. Definitely a 1.

However, we are deciding a honeymoon! Help us out! There will be a poll on my blog to the right. Vote! It's hard to decide, they all sound so good.
Speaking of getting married, planning is at a halt. Anyone wanna take over? Getting almost 200 addresses is a very tedious part of the planning.

Interruption: I think I should start having other people write a little bit. As in, Brittney and Megan can help me write some. Different point of views, different lives. There's a though that might turn out to be legit. Or I could do something like Julie and Julie except... Paula Deen. That could also be bad... I would end up gaining 200 lbs from all the butter. Not that I don't like her cooking, I LOVE Paula! In other words, I could use some ideas on how to make my life exciting. Maybe if I got enough feedback on what I should do, I would do it. Maybe I should make this into a vlog. I know reading is boring...

I'll work the details out later.

For now, here's a good party trick:


Things learned:
*zzzzzzzzzzzz
*Maybe I should vlog
*Border collies are good sheep herders.

Shalom in the Home

Searchin' hummm.... uh... I forget the words. Anyways, I thought of that because its almost midnight and I haven't written a blog yet today. That being said today was my Monday. Where we work didnt want to lay us off so we participate in a program that allows us to get paid for not working. Yeah pretty sweet... but not really. We get two days off. Four day weekend. One every once in a while would be great but every week is just... boring. I can only do the same thing every weekend for a little bit before getting tired of it, that and it is a little bit of a pay cut. On the bright side, we do get paid for not going to work and work goes a lot faster when we do work.

In other news I had a pillow fight this morning, well it was more of me beating Brittney with a pillow. She wouldn't get up. We had crap to do, like dishes and laundry. Speaking of laundry... I found a pair of my own underwear in my pants at work. Meaning they had to be stuck in one of the legs. This would have been better if they would have been Brittney's. It was weird having an extra pair of underwear in my pocket all night.

Today was yet again, an uneventful one sadly. I have days where its just ridiculous the things that happen. Then there are days where I am bored to death. On a scale of "deathly bored" 1 to "OMG WTF? 10," today was about a 2.33333333... I was so bored I was entertained by Ned's Declassified or whatever the heck it was.

Wow, not to mentioned I've been bored all day, but now even my blog is boring. Fail. I was hoping at least one crazy thing would happen... no such luck. Hopefully tomorrow will bring something a little more entertaining!

Oh! I hate solitaire btw. It's a stupid game. I can play 20 games of it and only win 3 times. Everyone likes winning, when you don't I think its like Sims... your happiness drops a couple points.



So lessons learned:
*BORING!
*Check your pants for your own underwear before going to work and
*Solitaire sucks.

Shalom in the home.

I really can be. But I get it from my momma. A typical mom though. A mad mother scares anyone. She once bitched to customer service enough at a David's Bridal type store that she got a free dress. What's so bad about that? Well we picked up bridesmaid dress that were paid for and took them home. The next day when we were putting them on, one was missing. Our first thought? That they hadn't given us the last dress. My mom went to go get it. The customer service or sales reps ended up giving my mom the dress for free because she was so angry. The problem? We lost the dress, they definitely gave it to us. It had just fallen in the back of the closet. Amazing what an angry mother can get.

Reason for the story? Well... I had one of those moments today. See our internet has been going down a lot. We're constantly rebooting the router or modem. It sucks. So I finally called Cox, who told me it wasn't the connection or modem. It was the router. So I then called Belkin, the makers of the router. Phone call #1 wasn't too bad. The guy couldn't speak English that well but what was irritating is that he was dumb. He had to keep putting me on hold to check if he was doing it right. WTF? That phone call was abruptly ended when I lost connection or something. So phone call #2 was worse. This guy had even worse English than the first and talked really quiet. I explained to him the situation and what the other guy had told me to do. He walked me through some more steps which not only did it not work, it made the problem WORSE. The internet wasn't working at all unless the computer was directly plugged into the modem. So he just told me they would replace my router for free, but to do that he needed to transfer me. That ended when the guy took me off of hold and hung up. Seriously? Now I was pissed. Phone #3. Oh it was bad. You know those rap songs that every other word is bleeped out? This was worse. I don't think anything pleasant came out of my mouth. It was a female too, so she acted like she knew how to deal with me. She just made me angrier. I don't think I have been that mean to anyone in my life. So she gets hateful and it just keeps escalating until finally she tells me they can't replace my router because its not under warranty. I lost it. Basically I told her what I though of Belkin and that I am now a loyal Linksys customer even though I've never had one and that she should go and... have a nice life.

Now my mom comes back into the picture! She has a router that I'm going to be using. Thank God for mommas!!! Here's mine: I don't know what I would do without this crazy little thing.

Beyond that today's day in the life of a lesbian was pretty uneventful. See, we're normal...



Today's lesbian lessons:
*We get it from our momma.
*Get bitchy if you need to
*I'm craving some chocolate covered pretzels.

Shalom in the home.

I hate mornings. I used to love them. Here's what my mornings look like.

No, but seriously. I don't, scratch that, I won't get up before about 9:30 or 10. I almost miss getting up early. Almost. This morning just happened to remind me that. First I wake up to a crash, freakin' dogs knocked over the "gate." Got up, rounded the dogs up and headed for the bathroom. Where the stupid cats (we lock them in the bathroom because they piss on couches, tear up the couches and make loud and random noises) has crapped. Well one of them crapped. So gotta clean that up. Because I'm up, now I have to let everyone out. This whole things takes about 45 minutes. Done. Bed. YEAH RIGHT!
Dogs whine now because they've been out and want to play. Awesome. Day started.
Within two hours of waking up, Brittney got her foot mauled by Gus, hit her knee on a table and stubbed her toe on the Xbox.
However, I did get some wedding stuff done. Getting closer to actually being done planning the stupid thing. Our maid of honor is pretty stellar though, very funny girl.
Apparently she loves planning the wedding so I think we should just let her do it. So hint hint Courtney.


Today I have also had a impromptu Degrassi marathon. Yeah, Degrassi. Tonight, channel changes to Logo. Ru Paul's Drag Race. India Ferrah is on it!!! Watch it if you can!!

That and she'll be at the K-State Drag Show, Feb 12th. Get tickets!

There's my day in a cracked nutshell. Now for the story/pic/vid of the day. Let's see what I can find...



I don't know why I find that so amusing... So today's lessons:
*Mornings suck
*Courtney needs to get on the wedding planning
*India Ferrah is HOTT and
*that guy really wants a big booty bitch.

Shalom in the home.

In case you like to stereotype, this is not the blog to read.
I'm not stereotyping lesbians, I'm just giving you a look inside the mind/life of one.

For instance, what do lesbians in relationships fight about?
Um... everything. Well most of the same things that anyone in relationships deal with.
A typical fight for us would include (but not limited to): Whose turn it is to let the dogs out/ bathe them, how neither one of us like to do dishes/laundry, how the money should be spent, how to train the dogs, etc. Trivial things. But they always end the same, making up. Last fight I was given a cup... sounds stupid but look at it!

My new drinking cup..and Eddy?



Honestly, our relationship isn't much different. I think we moved really fast... Haven't you heard the U-haul joke? (For those of you that haven't, apparently lesbians bring a u-haul to the 2nd date.) I wouldn't say thats true. I mean, I don't speak for all lesbians when I say that we do move fast, but not THAT fast. Brittney and I moved in together after 3ish months. Fast sure, but it wasn't just because we could. She didn't really enjoy the dorm scene. Either way, I think that most lesbian move fast. Not all though, kudos to the slow movers.

So there's a question for anyone reading, what's something you've always wondered about the LGBT community?

I think I will do a story of the day too, assuming that I can keep this up everyday. Maybe a picture of the day.



That would be Roxanne. I miss that bitch. Click to enlarge. :)

And here's a video!



In conclusion...
*Lesbians fight too.
*Blogging can be boring but I'll try to make you laugh every time and
*Laugh at yourself, I STILL laugh at that stupid picture.

Shalom in the Home

Someone should remind me to blog more often. I think I might make this blog a little different. Something like... A day in the life of lesbians.
Yes.
That works.

I'm planning our lesbian wedding right now and its a bit ridiculous. I guess I didn't realize how much goes into it.

I was having a discussion with a friend about it though. How many people can say "I'm so excited, it's my first lesbian wedding!" Weird thing to think about. First, that its lesbian... thats not something that happens everyday in the mid-west so when it does happen, it's a big deal to those involved. Second, that its lesbian, because thats controversy at its best. Not only are we gay, but now we want to get married. Not many people get excited about that. Which sucks because we have to get married in Iowa, technically. In Kansas our marriage will be non-existent. That then catapults into a controversial, heated discussion about gay marriage and religion and politics. No thanks!

I avoid those types of things. Sure I want to be an activist, but I can't stand conversing with ignorant people. It's not that I can't handle confrontation, it's my anger that I sometimes can't handle.

Either way let's not talk about it.


On another note, it's that time of year. Yes, for girl scout cookies. So far we've purchased 6 boxes and have 6 more somewhere in Ogden... What? They're good. You know, we know it, the girl scouts of America know it. If you don't buy their cookies, you are NOT American. I am so kidding, but seriously the cookies are real good. Our first 2 boxes are already gone. Not because WE ate them all, I believe our dogs had something to do with it.

Speaking of dogs, meet our family:



This is us. Britt (blonde) and me.





this is our lesbian roommate, Megan. I must specify sexual orientation to introduce you correctly you know...






This is Dutchess. A really talkative, sassy, slutty cat. This picture makes me laugh.





This is Edgar, a birthday present I got for Brittney. He's, well he's a punk.





This is Marley. Megan's daschund. This bitch is crazy.





This is Eddy and Gus. Eddy is the little one, a long haired red dapple daschund. He's such a little baby. Gus, is a golden retriever mix. He's just the clumsy, goofy dog who likes to eat snow. Both are rescues and both are loved! :)





This is Riley, a corgi mix. Technically a rescue. She is the first dog we picked out together. She was stolen when she was a puppy but thankfully we got her back. She is the best dog anyone could ask for. Loyal, well trained, and very funny.





This is the oldest. Muffin. I've had her since I was about 9. She'll be 13 in July. Doesn't care for listening, but loves to cuddle.


Anyways, meet the family. Big, dysfunctional and happy. The best kind. I think thats enough for this blog. Until next time,

Shalom in the Home.

101 things about myself.

1. I am, in fact, Christian.
2. I am gay.
3. I am happily taken.
4. I DO believe in the future of agriculture.
5. I want and plan on joining the Air Force.
6. I will finish college.
7. I want to be a chef, maybe cook in Italy.
8. I love Toyota and want a Tundra.
9. I believe that friends come and go.
10. I believe ignorance is the root of racism.
11. I love FFA.
12. I love my parents.
13. My mom is short and fiesty, but sooo loveable.
14. My dad is gay, but that doesn't mean anything.
15. I'm adopted.
16. I like blogging, I just forget to do it.
17. I love technology and can't imagine life without it.
18. I text way too much.
19. I can be a b... you know.
20. I want to write a book.
21. I'm impatient.
22. It's hard for me to come up with things about myself for this.
23. I love tattoos and may be addicted to them.
24. I drink when I want, but am by no mean, an alcoholic.
25. I still like being a kid, even after 20.
26. If you're a jerk to me, watch out.
27. I strongly dislike brown nosers.
28. I also strongly dislike those that don't realized they're being brown-nosed.
29. I love dogs.
30. I hate cats.
31. Someday I want my own farm.
32. I can never decided my favorite drink, I like too many drinks.
33. I can decide my favorite song, but it changes constantly.
34. I can decide my favorite TV show, but it changes too.
35. I want to preform as a drag king at least once.
36. I like to fish.
37. I think cocky people can go... play in traffic.
38. I have no problem with marijuana being legalized. It's organic and natural, and should definitely be legalized for medical purposes.
39. I think the iPad is stupid. Next will be the iTampon.
40. I love being a girl other than that one week a month, which I don't understand why it has to happen.
41. I have a lot of flaky friends.
42. I love daschunds.
43. Cheaters (in relationships) make me angry.
44. I probably have an anger management problem.
45. My favorite color is green.
46. I've kissed in the rain.
47. I love Netflix.
48. I have an addictive personality.
49. I love xbox.
50. I love Call of Duty.
51. I'm obsessed with free-for-alls.
52. I love iPods.
53. My favorite energy drink is Bawls or Full Throttle (green).
54. I like to break rules.
55. I hate boundaries.
56. I say "God bless you!" anytime anyone sneezes, even if I don't know them.
57. I love meeting new people.
58. It's realllllyyyyy hard for me to keep coming up with new things to say.
59. I love Official Dress.
60. I don't understand why you would need a TV bigger than 40".
61. I think people who spend thousands of dollars on crap have no respect for human kind.
62. If I ever became a millionare, I would donate A LOT of it.
63. I love to dance.
64. I love music.
65. At one point in my life I could play a lot of instruments.
66. I hate gossiping, but I find myself a part of it at times.
67. I like watching Youtube videos. I could probably spend my whole day on it.
68. I'm an only child.
69. I think I would be great at advertising and coming up with slogans.
70. I think I would be a great chef/ restaurant owner.
71. I think I would be a great ag teacher.
72. I still am not 100% sure what I want to do with my life.
73. I was in 4-H and FFA.
74. I love Ellen DeGeneres.
75. I like Oprah.
76. I like to color.
77. I love learning.
78. I love smelly markers and flip charts.
79. I REALLY try to be healthy.
80. Humans are beautiful yet gross all at the same time.
81. I bought almost 1400 plastic eggs for $20.
82. I collect pocket knives.
83. I love jackets.
84. I love winter.
85. I would rather freeze to death than burn.
86. I'm not scared of dying.
87. I would be impressed if you're still reading this.
88. I <3 google.
89. I think that every year of your life gets better as time goes on.
90. I also think that there are more memorable years than others.
91. I love sharpies.
92. I wish I knew more about art, but I still like to pretend.
93. I love swimming.
94. I tan really easy.
95. I LOVE food.
96. I want a Mac.
97. I love people and meeting new ones.
98. I love traveling.
99. I love new experiences, people, food, etc.
100. I have a lot of view on politics, government and religion but I will NOT voluntarily talk about them. I find those subjects to be the worst ones to talk about.

101. I am me. Take me or leave me.



This was super hard and took me about 8 months to finish. Damn.
Alright well, you should try it too.

Shalom in the home.